What If He’s Four Years Younger?

I recently met a guy and he’s…simply, amazing. I have a “list” of what I look for in a guy and this guy tops the chart! Compared to other guys I’ve met, befriended, “hung out” with, and occasionally dated, this guy beats the cake. Never had I imagined I would meet someone like him but I have.

So you’re wondering, what’s on your list? Well, I came up with the idea from the classic film, “The Wizard of Oz.” My thinking is he must have the traits of the three characters: the tin man, the lion and the scarecrow. He must have: (1) a heart, (2) a mind, and (3) courage. Simple, right? Well, each of those characteristics have sub-traits I look for too. For example, if he must have a heart, he should treat people with respect (older and younger) and love for God (which could mean many things like going to church, being active in ministries). If I explained everything of this list, I would be on my way to writing a novel, so I won’t bore you with that, but that’s my list.

About this guy, though. I met him at church. I never really paid attention to him until I ended up in his Bible study class. Just as the class came to a close and we were about to pray, with my bowed head and closed eyes, I heard him ask, “What’s your name and can you pray for us?” I looked up to see his “heart-melting” eyes meet mine and all I could do was respond with my name and say yes. I prayed and as I was leaving, he thanked me for the prayer and wished me a great day. There were other occasions after where he’d somehow make his way to say hello to me or compliment me on my dress or a song I sang (yes, I like to sing). I began to admire him, observing him while he led out in Bible study class or lead a program for church. He was a natural born leader and principled. If it was time to pray, you’d better have your eyes closed kind of thing, but I admired that because he’s respectful, smart and other things. Just from observing him from a distance, I realized he’s different from other men I  befriended and very loved by many people. His kind I hadn’t seen in a lot of young men in this day and age.

I began taking more interest when once I joked around my family members while waiting for lunch at church if there was any guy they could see me with. A cousin who was visiting with us for a few weeks immediately called his name and my heart leaped. Was that a sign? I also started getting bizarre invitations from members of the church to come to programs especially when he was there. Deep down, I really wanted to get to know him more. This Christmas, we texted throughout the day (I know, why don’t we just pick up the phone to talk? It’s a generational thing.) I saw him yesterday to drop off some scarves for their homeless ministry, which he was spearheading and just before I left to head home, he walked me to my car and we spoke and got to know each other a bit more. He asked what I did in my profession, I asked about his family and so forth. We hugged and for a brief moment I became sad because I wanted us to continue talking but I didn’t want to keep him for too long and he had a meeting to attend. Here’s the kicker though, he’s four years younger and I don’t know what to think. Should I overlook the age, pursue this relationship and see where it goes or should I call it quits in getting to know him and move on hoping I’ll meet someone else more my age? Your thoughts? I’m opened.

The Gift of Giving

The Christmas holiday is just around the corner and I am almost done with shopping. Sometimes I get stressed out with shopping (not because of spending) but because  of the amount of time it takes to shop for someone. I like getting gifts for people that are functional and will be used a lot so I take awhile shopping for individuals. Just today, I was in a particular store and shopping for one item, but I had to take a peak at everything in the store and figure out if this would be ideal for the person I’m intending to buy the gift for. I won’t rest until I am convinced that what I get will be something the person can use, not just once, but occasionally or even better, frequently.

Though all this shopping has gotten to me, I ask myself: Is it worth getting? *I pause* Of course it is! Though December might be considered the month for booming business, I look at it as an opportunity to show a loved one, a  friend or even a stranger that you thought of them. I can’t help but think of the reaction on the person’s face when they unwrap and open their gift. I love that, “Oooo” or “Ahhhh” gesture that sends the message back non-verbally communicating “you got the right gift” and “thanks for thinking of me.”  That’s what I look and hope for.

I also think of the true meaning of the Christmas holiday. You know whom I speak of: Jesus. I don’t believe December 25 was the day He was born, but I do believe He was born in a real place called Bethlehem and it’s nice that we as humans celebrate that piece of biblical history. Sometimes I have to stop and think, “What God would ever come down from His throne to become human and die for me?” It’s unheard of! But when I think about it, that’s the meaning of love. It’s a gift. A selfless act of love. 1 John 4:8 reads, “If you knoweth not love, you knoweth not God, for God is love.” Ask any human in this world if they would want to be spat upon, accused of wrongdoing, falsely condemned, be stripped entirely naked and then be nailed on a piece of wood where you are strung up for hours until you suffocate and die and do all this to die for you so you can live. They’d say no, but Jesus did it. Not only for me, but for you. That’s love.

I’m pretty sure Jesus “shopped” around the consequences of having to save you and me from sin, but he made his decision and the result is priceless. For that I’m ever grateful to Him who thought enough of me to give me such a wonderful gift.

This Christmas, let the reminder of love, the greatest gift from heaven, enter your heart. Once it’s in there, share that love, give that love to others and it’ll be the sweetest emotion you’ll ever feel.


The Definition of Love (Kids’ Version)

Words mean a lot, especially telling someone you care that you love them. I emphasize telling, which caters to showing them (in action) how you love them, which really can bring a relationship together (no matter who is involved). Since Valentine’s Day is approaching, I thought I might share these wonderfully, delightful words of wisdom from none other than kids. They do say the darndest things, but they also can say the most thought provoking. What do you think? [Emphasis: This was a forward I received from a friend.]

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, ‘What does love mean?’ The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.



‘Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.’

Terri – age 4


‘Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.’

Danny – age 7


‘Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.

My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss’

Emily – age 8


‘Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.’

Bobby – age 7 (Wow!)


‘If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,’

Nikka – age 6

(we need a few million more Nikka’s on this planet)


‘Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.’

Noelle – age 7


‘Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well..’

Tommy – age 6


‘During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.

He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.’

Cindy – age 8


‘My mommy loves me more than anybody

You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.’

Clare – age 6


‘Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.’

Elaine-age 5


‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.’

Chris – age 7


‘Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day..’

Mary Ann – age 4


‘I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.’

Lauren – age 4


‘When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.’ (what an image)

Karen – age 7


‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t think it’s gross.’

Mark – age 6


‘You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.’

Jessica – age 8


And the final one — Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge.

The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,

‘Nothing, I just helped him cry’